Tag Archives: 1990s Minnesota

Artwork Archives: people of my early sobriety (besides Anita!)

Matt at the Bat Cave August 10 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesAs I’ve said before, the first thing I did when I got sober was start drawing portraits.

I met Matt when he came to the first party I ever gave at my first place of my own. I lived in a basement apartment on a really lovely street in St. Paul when I first got out of the halfway house, which of course we called The Batcave. Matt and I dated a little, briefly, but were mostly friends. He was a good man and always happy to pose for me.

Matt at the Batcave August 6 1989 by Suzanne Forbes aka Rachel KetchumMatt, August 6 1989. Did I mention he worked out?

Painting of Matt winter 1990 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne Forbes

Matt, winter 1990, acrylic on board.

This was done during the few months’ period after Anita and I moved in together and I started back to art school full time. I painted Anita many times, and Matt got painted too.

portrait of M seated by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne Forbes winter 1990Here he is in green.

I kept running out of paint and having to use a limited palette for practical, not aesthetic reasons!

St. Paul Matt and unkown 1989 or 1990 by Suzanne Forbes working as Rachel KetchumHere is Matt and someone else, not sure who, winter 1990 I think.

I have only the photocopy, so Matt must have gotten the drawing.

J and Tom perspective drawing Winter 1990 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne Forbes

Jamie and Tom in St. Paul, Jan or Feb 1990, pencil on paper.

Our friend Tom moved in with us when he got out of Fellowship House, and Jamie was the boy who appeared during the party Anita and I gave at the end of January for my one year and her six months sober. I was unwise to date him, but I did.

Keith at the Barbary Fig May 23 1990 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesKeith, March 1990, 9×12″, pencil on paper.

Keith Sketchbook 1990 Minneapolis by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesI met Keith at meetings, and we had one night of amazing sex. Then he ghosted me. As the kids call it nowadays.

I find it so strange, looking at these old drawings, to see how central men were in my young life.

As a teenager, half of my closest friends were guys, half were girls, and I slept with nearly all my friends back then! I really loved my male friends, gay and straight, and found it normal to be very close to guys in my teens and twenties.

However, when I got sober I did this thing in the halfway house called “Female Focus”, where I was not allowed to talk to the guys in the house for a week.

I liked it so much I asked for another week. I was going to women-only recovery meetings, too. Meeting so many strong women. It was at that point that I started slowly shifting, over decades, until today when I have far more women, pangender and non-binary friends.

“Women heal together”, we say in recovery meetings, and that has come to be the center of my life.

Tom at table drawing by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne Forbes June 1990Brian and Tom, June 1990, ballpoint, 9×12″.

Tom and I were best friends during the year or two of early sobriety when I carried a sketchbook EVERYWHERE I went, and I made so many drawings of him! He was a great friend and companion, and is doing good work today. I am gonna do a separate post with all the pics of him, there are so many!

Kirk Kristlibas Rachel Ketchum and Rob Houston Fall 1990 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesKirk and me and Rob, Fall 1990.

rob h at harriet st 1990 by Suzanne Forbes aka Rachel KetchumKirk Kristlibas, an incredible multi-disciplinary artist, and Rob Houston, another very talented guy, lived in a beautiful flat in Uptown Minneapolis, and I met them my second semester at the Minneapolis College of Art and Design.

I would go visit them and hang out in their wonderful creative home, which they had painted in rich jewel tones. They also had a tremendous fish tank. More art of Kirk here. Kirk was my dear friend, and we had fun.

Rob was beautiful in the way that I got really messed up by back then, and our friendship was fraught.

kirk me and rob harriet st 1990 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne Forbes

kirk and rob harriet st 1990 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne Forbes

Kirk was easy to draw and I got several good likenesses of him.

I wish that I had made a picture of Rob Houston that captured his beauty as a young man, though.

Sketchbook 1990 fantasy Ani and Gigi by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesMy friend Ani was a big part of my life, until she cockblocked me!

This is a fantasy drawing of Ani and her girlfriend Gigi from 1990. Done on birthday request I believe! Ani and Gigi were one of those lesbian power couples for a long time. Then at one point, Ani left town. Time passed. I met this girl named Liz, who I really liked.

Liz and I had a couple of nice evenings together, I thought she liked me, I was hoping we could get together.

Sketchbook 1992 liz by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesHere’s a picture of Liz I drew then, early 1992.

Then Ani roared back into town on her motorcycle like a blonde metal recovery biker goddess, and Liz forgot I existed and ran off to run around with Ani!

What the hell, Ani.

There are quite a lot of other portraits of friends from this period; however I archived those on the last pass at archiving, in 2009, and they can be found here on my flickr.

Only two of these drawings had ever been photographed; until now, no record of the rest of them existed – if we had a fire or flood they would just be gone forever.

I am so grateful to my Patrons on Patreon, whose monthly financial support makes it possible for me to take time to document my art archives.

Drawings from the Halfway House: Portraits from the earliest days of my sobriety.

Sue at Fellowship Mar 9 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesThe first thing I started drawing, when I arrived at Fellowship House in St. Paul, was the people around me.

This portrait of a woman named Sue in the living room of “The House” was drawn on March 9, 1989, so I had only been sober 41 days, and only at Fellowship a few days. Newly sober, I was still completely determined to be a comic artist, and wanted to get back to practicing. Sue reminded a lot of my teenage bestie GIlly.

Michael at Fellowship April 11 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesMy beloved friend Michael. Michael and I shared a connecting bathroom in the last month we were in the house, as “Senior Peers”.

He was a marvelous professional Broadway singer and dancer; we went to Alvin Ailey together. I loved to hear him bustling in the bathroom, making fabulous. He was so handsome, and posed so well! I think I drew those kinda ’80s design elements of the circles to reference the stage. His T-cell count was ok when I was last in touch with him, so I very much hope he made it to the next generation of treatments.

Scott at Fellowship June 27 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesThis is Scott.

I don’t think I slept with him, but it looks like I would have liked to?

A lot of the guys at the house wore those preppy Hamptons shoes. Dockers maybe?

George at Fellowship May 14 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesGeorge was such a preppy. May 14, 1989.

Most of these are photocopies; we had a copy machine in the office at the halfway house, so I could make copies and the subjects kept the originals.

Fell on the Beach at Fellowship May 7 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesFell was also a preppy, but like a Bad Preppy?

He was the renegade scion of some rich Florida family. I was like, if they didn’t want you to be fucked up, they should not have named you “Fell”. May 7, 1989.

Rebeckah.

A ferocious, feisty girl from Queens, drawn April 7, 1989. She was so young, not even twenty.

Tom at Fellowship May 28 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesTom, a New Yorker who I got along well with. May 28, 1989.

My heart aches, to think that most of these people are probably dead. The relapse rate was incredibly high.

Robert at Fellowship June 3 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesRobert, who was a lovely kind man. June 3, 1989.

Julia at Fellowship May 7 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesJulia, my friend and roommate, who I called “Jewel”.

She was lying on the hill behind the house (which was the old Schmidt brewery owners’ mansion) in the early Spring sun. People used to come lounge on the “Beach” as we called it and wait for me to draw them.

Me and Julia at Fellowship April 7 1989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesI also did a drawing of Julia and I in the room we shared.

Being a single mom and a working-class lady, she was orderly and had her shit together, despite the whole alcoholic thing. So she found my sloppiness and chaos astounding. However, this was a day when we’d both gotten packages from home (thank you Mom!!!) and so the mess was truly a remarkable thing to witness.

Ray at Fellowship March 191989 by Rachel Ketchum aka Suzanne ForbesThis is Ray.

He was a kind, haunted, deeply depressed man; he killed himself not too long after I made this drawing. This is a photocopy; I gave the original of the drawing to his family, who were glad to have a picture from the last year of his life.

A lot of people I knew in treatment killed themselves even in the first year.

A lot of them relapsed. A lot of them had HIV or AIDS. And hepatitis. The odds for recovery from chemical dependency are very, very poor. I know I’ve been incredibly lucky, and I’ve been living on borrowed time since I was 22. But I’d like to keep living, and working, anyway!

So I am on total self-isolation, with my husband, and expect to remain so indefinitely. For months, possibly. If I have to stay inside for a year to survive this, I will totally fucking do it.

I’ve been doing fine without alcohol and heroin since 1989, surely I can manage a year without outside!

Only one of these portraits had ever been photographed; no modern media record of the rest existed – if we had a fire or flood they would just be gone forever. And of course, I am the only person who knows when they were made and why, the story of the people in the pictures.

As a highly-vulnerable person with asthma and auto immune illness, it seems more important than ever to document my life’s work. Not morbid, just pragmatic!

I am so grateful to my Patrons on Patreon, whose monthly financial support makes it possible for me to take time to document my art archives.